Has anyone ever told you, “God will never give you more than you can handle?” This phrase is often used to express encouragement during difficulties and to comfort people grieving the loss of a loved one. But if I am being honest, it makes me a little angry.
Much More Than I Could Handle
Much More Than I Could Handle
My intense reaction to this phrase comes from a dark time in my life. After I lost my son, Stephen, when he was a year old, I heard this phrase frequently. So, not wanting to appear lacking in faith, I stuffed my grief down deep. But as the days turned to months and even years, my pain festered and intensified into anger and depression.
I blamed myself for his illness and for not fighting hard enough on his behalf. Because I wasn’t coping well in the aftermath, the enemy whispered lies about being a terrible mother to my other children. No amount of counseling or medication could ease my agony.
Then came the day when I could no longer go on. I felt unworthy of God’s love and believed my family would be better off without me.
But God…He saved me physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It didn’t happen overnight. It took months of seeking God, reading His Word, journaling, seeing a Christian counselor, and allowing the Holy Spirit to strengthen and encourage me. Through God’s grace, I slowly overcame my grief and guilt. His love, comfort, and Word guided me and helped me stand against the enemy’s lies.
If I could have saved myself, I would have. But I couldn’t. It was more than I could handle. I needed God’s help.
Is It True?
You may be thinking, the phrase, “God will never give you more than you can handle,” must be true because you’ve heard it frequently. But just because it has become a common sentiment does not make it true.
There are many common cultural sentiments, such as “Follow your heart” and “Find your own truth,” which, if followed, could lead you down the wrong path. The only source of truth is God’s Word, the Bible. The Bible tells us God’s Word is truth (John 17:17). The Word instructs us to follow God (Matthew 16:24), not our deceitful heart (Jeremiah 17:9), and whatever feels good. However, the Bible does not say, “God will never give you more than you can handle.”
The Bible does contain a similar verse. But it is about temptation. “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it” (1 Corinthians 10:13, NIV).
Sadly, 1 Corinthians 10:13 has been misinterpreted and distorted into something it was never intended to convey. It does not mean God will never give people suffering, trials, temptations, pain, and situations that they can’t handle on their own.
Walking Through Difficulties
Friend, God does allow us to walk through difficulties in life. Consider the story of Job. He lost his children, his health, and everything he owned merely because Satan wanted to test his faith in God. Yet, even in his deep suffering, Job’s story reminds us that God never abandoned him.
Jesus Himself prepared our hearts for this reality when He said, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world” (John 16:33, NIV).
Trials and tribulations come because we live in a fallen world, influenced by the evil one. At other times, our struggles are the painful consequences of our own mistakes and sin.
But, dear one, here is our hope: God always has a purpose for our pain. He takes what the enemy intends for harm and brings good from it (Genesis 50:20). We learn perseverance, grow, and become more like Jesus (Romans 5:3-4). In our dire distress, we learn to seek after God sincerely. When we do, He meets us with divine intervention (Jeremiah 29:12-13; Psalm 37:40).
We Don’t Have To Handle Hardship on Our Own
In life, there will be peril, pain, trials, temptations, suffering, and situations we aren’t strong enough to handle on our own. But when we are weak, we can lean into God and His Spirit. That’s why Paul said, “But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NIV).
I am not sure I will ever get to Paul’s level of delighting in difficulties. But friend, I do know that when we walk through storms, we can count on God to calm them (Psalm 107:29). God promises to always be with us (Joshua 1:9). And we can count on God to keep His promises because He is faithful (Hebrews 10:23).
Take Away
Dear one, I wish I could promise you life won’t hurt. The truth is, sometimes it does. But don’t let other people’s well-intended, if not misguided, platitudes cause you to feel worse, as I did. God doesn’t give us more than we can handle, but the world and the enemy will. However, when it does, we can trust God. By His grace, when we seek Him, He will offer us comfort, hope, and strength. God will direct our steps and make a way when we can’t see through the storm.
Further Reading
To read more about understanding and dealing with Life’s Struggles, read Comfort for a Broken Heart Seeking Blame and Why God?
To read more about God’s Truth, read Try, Try Again.
