Recently, a couple of my followers commented on my social media posts, saying they disagree with what I wrote because God has abandoned them.
It broke my heart to hear they genuinely believed this. I have tried to reply and encourage them. But my words have been inadequate. I wrote this post in response, knowing that the only way I can help them understand is to share that, although it may have seemed like it at the time, God never abandoned me in my darkest seasons of struggle.
My Son
Feeling Abandoned
It was a rough season. My husband’s employer transferred him to a new state. This meant I had to give up my job and career track and leave my family behind. After we moved, I struggled to adapt to my new home. It was hard to suddenly become a stay-at-home mom and care for an infant, with no friends or family support. During the next couple of years, I learned to cope, but I drifted away from the Lord.
By the time I gave birth to my son, I had finally settled into a routine, albeit a lonely one. A new child always brings excitement and hope. However, our excitement faded when our son became ill frequently and we discovered he had multiple disabilities. My life became a daily battle of giving him care, getting him help, and surviving emotionally. I can’t tell you how many nights I lay in bed wondering where God was in all of it.
When my son was 11 months old, he became so sick that we rushed him to the hospital, and he nearly died. Yet he astounded the doctors and rebounded. However, two months later, he wasn’t as lucky and passed away. I was beyond consolable. But worst of all, I was angry–angry at myself for not being able to save him, and furious at God for allowing him to suffer and die. I sincerely believed that God had abandoned me.
Looking Back – Not Abandoned
I cannot fully explain how I survived that season. It took years of grieving, questioning, and even raging at God. Yet looking back, I can see He never left us. He was sustaining us in ways I could not recognize at the time.
Two months before Stephen died, doctors said he would not survive the night. However, God healed him. Those extra months gave us time to know and love our son without constant sickness. Practical provisions came too: a Christian friend connected us with the Foundation for Blind Children, which provided therapies at no cost. When Stephen became ill for the last time, we were visiting family, surrounded by support. He passed away on Easter Sunday, a day that proclaims resurrection and new life.
I was also seven months pregnant, a pregnancy we had not planned. God knew I would need this child. Being pregnant forced me to keep going, to eat, to care for myself, and to survive. My daughter and new son became anchors when I could not anchor myself.
God even spoke to my heart through words at Stephen’s funeral: “Jesus was holding out His hands, waiting to receive Stephen the moment his soul left his body.” Those words planted a seed of hope, nurtured through friends and neighbors until I eventually found my way back to Him.
God brought beauty from the ashes. My younger sister came to faith, and over the next few years, many in my family did as well. I am not saying Stephen had to die for God to save us. But even when I felt abandoned, God was right beside me. God even used our pain and heartbreak to accomplish His good purposes.
God’s Son
Feeling Abandoned
Even Jesus, in His humanity, experienced a moment when it appeared God had abandoned Him. While He fully trusted God and submitted to God’s will and plan, the weight of suffering, betrayal, and the sin of the world pressed on Him in a way no one else has ever known.
In that moment of overwhelming suffering, in His anguish, Jesus cried out, “Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?” which means, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mark 15:34, NIV).
The disciples must have felt abandoned as well. They watched the One they believed was the Messiah be betrayed, condemned, and crucified. They were confused, heartbroken, and afraid, unable to understand why God was allowing such darkness. In their fear and grief, they may have assumed that God had forgotten them, too.
Looking Back – Not Abandoned
However, after the resurrection, the disciples were able to look back and understand what they had missed in the moment. Jesus’ death was not a sign of God’s absence but of His deep, redemptive love. Every prophecy had been fulfilled. Every promise God made was kept. And through Jesus’ suffering, God accomplished His plan to save all humanity.
What the disciples interpreted as abandonment was actually the very center of God’s salvation story. Jesus’ cry from the cross was not a loss of faith, but the honest expression of human anguish. Jesus’ cry reminds us that even the Son of God understands what it feels like to be overwhelmed, vulnerable, and alone, yet God’s presence is never truly absent.
Looking back, the disciples could see that God had been present the entire time. God did not abandon Jesus or his disciples. He was working through the darkest moment in history to bring about the greatest gift ever given.
Practical Steps When You Feel Abandoned
Even when it feels like God has left us, His presence and faithfulness remain. There are practical steps we can take to navigate these dark seasons.
Look Back
Take time to reflect on your own journey and God’s faithfulness in the past.
In the years after my son’s death, I began to see how God had provided strength, comfort, and guidance in ways I hadn’t noticed at the time. Similarly, the disciples felt abandoned and confused when Jesus was crucified, but after the resurrection, God’s presence and plan became clear. What seemed like tragedy was part of His deliberate plan, and the resurrection revealed His ultimate purpose:
“This man was handed over to you by God’s deliberate plan and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put him to death by nailing him to the cross. But God raised him from the dead, freeing him from the agony of death, because it was impossible for death to keep its hold on him” (Acts 2:23-24).
Read God’s Word
Seek understanding and encouragement in Scripture. As we read the stories of God’s people, we see His faithfulness in action, how He guided, protected, and provided for them even in the darkest circumstances. For example, Joseph endured betrayal, slavery, and imprisonment, yet God was with him every step of the way. Through his obedience and faith, Joseph ultimately provided for and saved many people during the famine:
“The famine was severe in all the world, but in the land of Egypt, there was bread. And people from all the earth came to Joseph to buy grain, because the famine was severe everywhere” (Genesis 41:57, NIV).
Stand on God’s Promises
When life feels overwhelming or God seems distant, we can anchor ourselves in His promises. God’s Word assures us of His love, presence, strength, and faithfulness. Some of His promises include:
- He will never leave or forsake us (Deuteronomy 31:6)
- He will strengthen and help us (Isaiah 41:10)
- He will comfort us in our sorrow (2 Corinthians 1:3-4)
- He works all things together for our good (Romans 8:28)
- He redeems and restores us (Joel 2:25)
As Psalm 145:13 (NLT) reminds us, “The LORD always keeps his promises; he is gracious in all he does.” And in Christ, all God’s promises find their fulfillment: “For all of God’s promises have been fulfilled in Christ with a resounding ‘Yes!’” (2 Corinthians 1:20, NLT).
Standing on these promises does not make our struggles disappear, but it gives us a firm foundation and hope that God is faithful, even when we cannot see the whole picture.
Pray
When it feels like God has abandoned us, prayer is a lifeline. It is how we bring our fears, grief, and confusion to Him, trusting that He listens and cares. Prayer is not just about asking for relief; it is about opening our hearts to God and seeking His guidance and peace.
Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV) reminds us: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Through prayer, we invite God’s presence into our pain. Even when circumstances remain difficult, prayer allows His peace to guard our hearts and strengthen us from the inside out.
Submit to His Will
When we feel God has abandoned us, our natural instinct is to take control. Yet the Bible encourages us to, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6, NIV).
Friend, submission is hard. However, it is an act of trust, not a denial of our feelings. We may not see God’s plan clearly, but we can trust His character: that He is loving, wise, and faithful.
Submission often begins with small steps, such as choosing obedience in daily life, reading Scripture, praying, forgiving, showing patience in difficult situations, and staying connected to God through worship. Each of these acts aligns our hearts with His purposes, allowing Him to guide us step by step, even when His plan feels hidden.
Dear one, these steps are not a quick fix but rather a process of trusting God even when life feels unbearable. As we practice them, we begin to see His presence and faithfulness, even in the darkest seasons.
Walking Forward in Faith
Unfortunately, God doesn’t promise a life without trouble or pain. Sometimes we walk through fire, endure heartbreak, or navigate loss. Yet Scripture reminds us: “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” (2 Corinthians 4:8-9, NIV).
Friend, we are not destroyed because even when life doesn’t feel good, God is with us. Even when we cannot see God working, feel Him, or hear His voice, God is still there, orchestrating all things for our ultimate good. His Word reminds us that difficulties stretch our faith, grow our character, and shape us into the image of Christ.
Though God is sometimes silent, He is never absent. His faithfulness endures forever. Even in our darkest moments, when God’s silence feels deafening, His light remains within our hearts. He is still Emmanuel—God with us (Matthew 1:23).
Read More about God’s Faithfulness
Psalm 34: A Song of Praise And Promise
